What Pisses Off Waiters/Waitresses? The number one pisser offer for men and women who serve for a living is? (Drum Roll).... It's the asswipe that doesn't tip at all, well, if you're a lousy waiter/waitress, you don't deserve a penny, and I mean it considerably. I myself have been stereotyped in a place called Kimo's in Lahaina a long time ago. Well, for one, I'm Filipino born here on Maui, and my date at the time was a cool blonde from California. The waiters? They were all tall in shape looking surfers, blonde to be exact, and the hostess was kind of rude, I mean we both were dressed for the occasion, we did not look like slobs. But to make this clear, you don't judge a book by its cover, and I guess those employees at the time thought I was some low income local that stole the clothes and the girl, and wouldn't tip them out after we ate. How wrong were they? Big time wrong because I had a lot of cash in my pocket, and was going to order the best for me and my chick friend. So to put it on fast-track, we split. And oh yeah, I did have a reservation, but for some God only knows reason, our 7 pm got to be 8pm and beyond, seriously, they said we could wait at the bar, so we waited, and waited until I finally said F this shit! I didn't even tip the bartender even though it wasn't his fault. I just felt a bit degraded, and above all disrespected in my own town, it was an embarrassment for myself after telling Debbie that Kimo's ruled and it was right on the water you know? How do you think I felt? Pretty lame I must say.
So this is how waiters/waitresses/hostesses and bartenders can't get a tip, if it's the customer is pissed to begin with. You want a tip, you have to give a hundred percent night in night out, whatever shifts you got. But a lot of waiters and waitresses do give it a hundred percent, and if the bozos eating at their tables don't bother leaving a dime, it can really get a staff member bloody peed. All of the professionals in the front of the house should understand that some people will just not tip, again, it's hard when they're trying to pay the bills, and the tips from credit cards are automatically logged down for the tax collectors.
What waiters/waitresses really want is cash tips, that way they have it right then and there, on the spot to divvy up with the bussers, and kitchen staff. But not getting a tip for doing an honest hard working job on some bozos is really the shits in a shitty way.
I've waited tables and there's no worse feeling than being left a zero tip. I figured this out, and if you are a waiter/waitress follow me on this. When dealing with bozos, just don't expect a tip, just let that go, maybe spit in the asswipe's water or something I don't know, I figure you can get creative on this. But here is where I made bank. You see, as a restaurant employee, I went to other restaurants to eat and drink and made friends that worked there, like other bartenders, waiters etc. When I go to their digs and if their service was great, I'd drop more than the measly 15%. So when they came to my section, I buffed them out real good, even paying for some of their drinks and appetizers, what I lost in that, I made up for in their gratuity. Seriously. Let's say there was 4 happy waitresses from another dig and they sat at my table. I'd buy their first round, that's about 12 bucks. Then I slide them some won tons and some shrimp for their pupus and that's another 12 bucks. So I'm down 24 bucks right there. But by the time they're all sauced and their bill is like 70 bucks with more drinks and food that they ordered. And waitresses on free fun time is the best because they know that my job is hard, and if I gave them the A game, guess what? My tip was gonna be huge! It wasn't uncommon for me to rake in at least 80 bucks cash, that's 20 each from that one table. So 80 less 24 is 56 bucks cash. I made my cost for the first round and two trays of appetizers and then some, you get the picture?
Here's another tip for you aspiring waiters/waitresses, always wipe something if it's slow, it shows cleanliness, it shows you're a professional, and that the flatware and glasses are spotless because of you. Seriously guys, if not getting big tips is pissin you off these days, you may try some of these tips. When you have an important looking customer, say he's a local businessman, he's in the newspapers, introduce yourself to him, usually these people understand hard work and profits, so when they see you giving it an ass kicking they'll notice you for sure. Offer them extra bread, pay for it. Offer them a glass of wine, and pay for it, say it's on the house, tell them, "Hey Mr. So and So, I saw you donate 10,000.00 dollars to the local school, man my kid goes there, thanks a lot, my name is Ron." He no doubt will feel appreciated, because business people are well, people too. Get to know them, call them by their last names first until they tell you not to. Mr. Jones or Mrs. Wong, never by their first names first. I tell you what if I was a businessman with lots of money, and saw a waiter be professional, and showed he recognized what I did, I'd leave that waiter a nice hefty tip, cash if I had it or more than the standard on the credit card tab.
Giving more of yourselves as a waiter/waitress will get you more in the long run, if you're always thinking "give me a tip" without really working hard for it, you'll never get a good tip. This guy I know is an old waiter, been around a long time. He always treats every table like they're VIPs, but he also gets pissed when bozos don't tip. Yeah it's like shooting craps, sometimes you just roll snake eyes and it hurts!
WARNING: MURDERING YOUR CUSTOMERS IN THE PARKING LOT CAN LAND YOU IN PRISON. PLEASE TAKE A DEEP BREATH BEFORE TAKING THE CHEF'S KNIFE AND START TO RUN AFTER A BOZO THAT DOESN'T TIP.
So this is how waiters/waitresses/hostesses and bartenders can't get a tip, if it's the customer is pissed to begin with. You want a tip, you have to give a hundred percent night in night out, whatever shifts you got. But a lot of waiters and waitresses do give it a hundred percent, and if the bozos eating at their tables don't bother leaving a dime, it can really get a staff member bloody peed. All of the professionals in the front of the house should understand that some people will just not tip, again, it's hard when they're trying to pay the bills, and the tips from credit cards are automatically logged down for the tax collectors.
What waiters/waitresses really want is cash tips, that way they have it right then and there, on the spot to divvy up with the bussers, and kitchen staff. But not getting a tip for doing an honest hard working job on some bozos is really the shits in a shitty way.
I've waited tables and there's no worse feeling than being left a zero tip. I figured this out, and if you are a waiter/waitress follow me on this. When dealing with bozos, just don't expect a tip, just let that go, maybe spit in the asswipe's water or something I don't know, I figure you can get creative on this. But here is where I made bank. You see, as a restaurant employee, I went to other restaurants to eat and drink and made friends that worked there, like other bartenders, waiters etc. When I go to their digs and if their service was great, I'd drop more than the measly 15%. So when they came to my section, I buffed them out real good, even paying for some of their drinks and appetizers, what I lost in that, I made up for in their gratuity. Seriously. Let's say there was 4 happy waitresses from another dig and they sat at my table. I'd buy their first round, that's about 12 bucks. Then I slide them some won tons and some shrimp for their pupus and that's another 12 bucks. So I'm down 24 bucks right there. But by the time they're all sauced and their bill is like 70 bucks with more drinks and food that they ordered. And waitresses on free fun time is the best because they know that my job is hard, and if I gave them the A game, guess what? My tip was gonna be huge! It wasn't uncommon for me to rake in at least 80 bucks cash, that's 20 each from that one table. So 80 less 24 is 56 bucks cash. I made my cost for the first round and two trays of appetizers and then some, you get the picture?
Here's another tip for you aspiring waiters/waitresses, always wipe something if it's slow, it shows cleanliness, it shows you're a professional, and that the flatware and glasses are spotless because of you. Seriously guys, if not getting big tips is pissin you off these days, you may try some of these tips. When you have an important looking customer, say he's a local businessman, he's in the newspapers, introduce yourself to him, usually these people understand hard work and profits, so when they see you giving it an ass kicking they'll notice you for sure. Offer them extra bread, pay for it. Offer them a glass of wine, and pay for it, say it's on the house, tell them, "Hey Mr. So and So, I saw you donate 10,000.00 dollars to the local school, man my kid goes there, thanks a lot, my name is Ron." He no doubt will feel appreciated, because business people are well, people too. Get to know them, call them by their last names first until they tell you not to. Mr. Jones or Mrs. Wong, never by their first names first. I tell you what if I was a businessman with lots of money, and saw a waiter be professional, and showed he recognized what I did, I'd leave that waiter a nice hefty tip, cash if I had it or more than the standard on the credit card tab.
Giving more of yourselves as a waiter/waitress will get you more in the long run, if you're always thinking "give me a tip" without really working hard for it, you'll never get a good tip. This guy I know is an old waiter, been around a long time. He always treats every table like they're VIPs, but he also gets pissed when bozos don't tip. Yeah it's like shooting craps, sometimes you just roll snake eyes and it hurts!
WARNING: MURDERING YOUR CUSTOMERS IN THE PARKING LOT CAN LAND YOU IN PRISON. PLEASE TAKE A DEEP BREATH BEFORE TAKING THE CHEF'S KNIFE AND START TO RUN AFTER A BOZO THAT DOESN'T TIP.
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