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PERSONAL CHEF

PERSONAL CHEF
FOOD FOR REAL PEOPLE

Saturday, July 13, 2013

Maui's Ruby's Diner- Fried Egg Sandwich w/ Turkey Sausage

NOTE: THIS IS HUMOR WRITING FOLKS.

THE FOOD AT RUBY'S IS GREAT, LOVE IT, PRICES ARE REASONABLE, SO IF YOU ARE NOT INTO HUMOR MAYBE DON'T READ THIS! HOWEVER IF YOU DO ENJOY.

ONCE AGAIN, KIRK AND STAFF AT RUBY'S DINER IN QUEEN KAAHUMANU IS THE BOMB! GREAT FOOD, GREAT SERVICE.

My love for breakfast, hot coffee, fresh Wall Street Journal, o.j., toast with real butter, not that fake ass shit! Eggs Benedict, crisp bacon on the side, hash browns, corned beef hash. Love that high cholesterol diets for breakfast man. The only time a cease to eat that type of breakfast is if I'm catching a flight to Argentina or Frankfurt for business, and the flight is a couple hours away, I'll be pooping all over the place, a hearty breakfast like this needs to be eaten when you have the luxury to take a crap at your leisure, preferably at home and not in some public restroom.

On this day 7/12/13, had a meeting with some friends discussing funds, you know funds as in "I need f....ing money!" Yeah that kind..funds.

So Al tells me "So what you need the funds for?"

"Well Al, I was thinking buy some cocaine, and resell em for profit, what you think?"

"Hmmm..not a bad idea just don't get caught."

Then he says, "Hey Ron let's go to Ruby's Diner and eat."

I was like "No shit? Eat? Shit yeah I'll eat!!!! And eat, and eat, and eat!!!"

So when we get there it was moderately full, locals mostly since it is summer vay cay time. To the left of us there was a no doubt a Christian family, when they got their meals, they all bowed their heads in prayer, I thought it was cool, hey I'd rather see someone praying than someone standing up on their chairs and say, "F...k Yeah!!!! Yee Ha! After this we gonna kill some ......ggaz" Nope don't want that, these folks were praying nicely. And then a kind of washed up hippy couple sat down, I wanted to tell them, "Hey there's no hummus here."

So Al he gets a Cobb Salad, the salad was named after Elmer Cobb, that cartoon character from Bugs Bunny...Oh no that's Elmer Fudd not Cobb. Oh well, hey I'm almost 50 my brains going dead. But Al has a Cobb Salad.















Price for this Cobb Salad? $3,899.99 plates optional.















And then when it was my turn to order, like a little kid excited because the guy playing Santa just got busted for possession of a Glock 9MM, loaded on his way to center stage at the mall, I was like, "Mam, mam, can I gets me the Fried Egg Sandwich with Turkey Sausage mam?" The waitress was like, "Sure young man."

And this was it, price? $1,045.39 plates optional comes with a Ruby's Diner Radio Controlled Drone with bombs, or a Ruby's Diner Syringe (LSD) optional.
















Copyright 2013

Photos and text are owned by Ron Sambrano, usage of material without written consent from Ron Sambrano is prohibited.